Abortion is a trauma. It is an event significant enough to trigger a stress response known as Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). There are certain symptoms of PTSD that exhibit themselves more often in mothers and fathers bereaved by abortion and this is sometimes referred to as Post Abortion Stress Syndrome (PASS).
You may read through these symptoms and find yourself feeling relieved. You have not suddenly changed your character, you are not going crazy, you are struggling with trauma. 

The British Journal of Psychiatry published a study in 2018 which concluded:

"The results of this analysis indicated that women who have had an abortion experienced an 81% higher risk of mental health problems of various forms when compared with women who had not had an abortion."
View the study here.

The Royal College of Psychiatrists term president 1990-1993 Professor Andrew Sims had even said that:

"There is nothing so detrimental to a woman's mental health as abortion."

One of the most effective ways to deal with traumatic events in our lives, is to talk about them. PASE is a growing community of women who are ready to listen because they have been where you are now. There is a way to healing and recovery.
Some of the symptoms of PTSD can be seen below. If you're living with some of these, be encouraged that there is a way forward towards healing.